lost

The house is super empty now.  I feel a mix between jealousy that he's the one going on deployment and I am left behind dealing with the same thing day in/day out.  But i also feel awkward, like I don't really know how to do this.  I don't know how to be the one who's left behind.  I barely know how to be a wife and now i'm the "deployment" wife.  Ugh.  The dog has been watching either out the window or at the door intently waiting for daddy to come home.  Brookie is such a daddy's girl. She's gonna go ape shit when he gets home :)  So tonight I am already in my pajamas, and full of food.  I had planned on going to the gym after he left since I have a recital sunday, but just not feeling up to it.  So spa day tomorrow then a quick workout I suppose and a run through of my performance.  I feel a little lost right now.  Talk to ya'll later.

Peace y'all